Monday, June 21

Summer Solstice
Today is the Summer Solstice. Go and dance naked around a tree.

Wednesday, June 16

The Virtual You
This is great. Put in your height, weight, body shape etc, and it builds a virtual model of you, that is very flattering indeed! I looked like Cameron Diaz on mine.

Perhaps I put the wrong measurement in.
Scary People
In my efforts to be the all new me, I just went to a meeting with scarey high-up people, which I had to 'chair'. I was scared stiff as usual, but made jokes about putting a gossip column in the staff newspaper and even gave them all some production schedules printed in a lovely shade of pink.

They probably think I'm a twat, but I didn't really care. A small step, but v brave for me.

Monday, June 14

Weddings and Babies and Things
Sometimes I can be a right miserable cow. I get the fear when there's a works night out, or a pub trip with friends of friends I don't know very well, and I never go along. I think that if people get to know me, they'll think I'm boring/strange/talk too much/talk too little/am a bit of a twat.

Anyway, I went to a wedding on Saturday and met this incredible woman called Emily. She is 37 years old, and said that when she was in her late twenties - just like I am now - she stopped worrying about what other people thought of her, and just thought 'Sod it. If they don't like me, tough. I know I'm OK really'.

So one day, she changed her life. She started wearing whatever she liked, eating whatever she fancied whenever she fancied it, and talking to absolutely anyone - from strangers on trains to the biggest scariest boss at work. And she was fab, and knows lots of interesting things about lots and lots of people, and had an infectious presence. And I want to be just like her.

So as of today, I am All New Emma.

Although, I am also mad hormonal Emma too. This morning I saw a girl I used to go to school with getting off the train that I was getting on. She was really heavily pregnant and looked so happy and healthy. And when I got on the train, I felt so jealous of her pregnant state, I started bloody crying! Think my womb has taken over my brain and done something funny to it.

But on the other hand, my friend Laura and decided today that we'll have babies in Spring 2006. But then I realised that means I could be up the duff in just 12 months from now. And that scared me. A lot.

If any men are reading this that think women are bonkers, it's all true. We totally are.

Friday, June 4

Something Nice What I Saw

A return to simple

Press the pause button.
It's time to feel the rain, the wind, the cold mountain air.
Turn the mobile phone off. It does have an off button.
Let the laptop power down.
Leave the e-mails go unread.
Shred the to-do list.
Unplug the television.
Ebay the Playstation.
Don't eat anything that you haven't made yourself.
Shop local.
Spend only what you can afford.
Leave the city.
Head to the hills.
Hear the quiet.
Look up at the sky.
Hear the noise of the wood.
Make a campfire.
Watch the fire flicker and the beans bubble.
Time to recharge those batteries.
Things got too complicated back there.

Thursday, June 3

Here's a profile of my new cat:

Name: Zebedee-Dave
Age: Four
Occupation: Cat
Colour: Black with a white beard, belly and feet
Tail: Wonky
Whiskers: Unfeasibly long
Best feature: Purrs loudly and a lot
Worse feature: Has a manky eye
Likes: Windowsills
Dislikes: Being called 'manky-eye'

Wednesday, June 2

Lofty Heights
The bloke that used to play Lofty - hapless love interest of the teenage acne-ridden Michelle in Eastenders - was the ghost writer of David Beckham's Autobiography. Look, here's the proof!